Beckett the Teen

Beckett turned 13 last week! As usual, in my mind, he's been that old for months. He is officially taller than me, still loves to give me hugs, is hilarious and the best to hang out with it. He is a great student and works hard to get straight A's. (Though it could have something to do with the $50 Scott gives them if they get all A's) Beckett is the best kid and I am so proud to call him mine. 

His actual birthday was rough. Maybe one of the hardest parenting moments of my life. He had a basketball game on his birthday. It was his favorite game of the year, Shelley. He loves playing my cousins son, Mackoy, and looks forward to this face off all year. And this year, he didn't get to play. Not even a single second. He sat on the bench the whole entire game. It was heartbreaking. I could feel his frustration growing the more the game progressed. Watching him sit was gut wrenching. There are two kids that play his position and are absolutely dedicated to the game and played the whole game. There were a handful of kids that sat the whole time. It was rough. 

Immediately after he came out of the locker room, he went straight to the car. I sat in the parking lot with him for 30 minutes while he cried and felt all the feelings. I felt them all with him and cried as I tried to comfort him. Watching him hurt so intensely was a pain that my heart had not experienced before. I was keenly aware that the advice I was giving was crucial in this moment and something he would probably remember forever. 

We talked for 30 minutes about how that game was in no way a reflection on him. It was poor coaching. We talked about how basketball is only a portion of his life and about the things that really matter, like who he is as a person. I shared my high school volleyball experience with him, which included a lot of bench sitting as well. We spoke about life and facing hard things. I told him that watching him sit on that bench was one of my proudest moments. Because sitting is way harder than playing and he sat through it. I wish I could have taken it away and carried all that pain, but it was something he had to do for himself. Eventually his tears dried and he was feeling better about life. We hugged and he thanked me for helping him feel better. In that moment, I felt a tiny glimpse of how Heavenly Father must feel for us. 

We went home and celebrated his birthday. We sang and ate cake and had a great time. We ended the night birthday shopping together, just me and him. I love hanging out with Beckett! He got a new outfit, but was especially excited when he found a pair of shoes for $2.99! They didn't fit him, but were Taydens size. He loves shoes and loves finding a deal, so it was just the boost he needed! 

Beckett is the apple of my eye. We have a sweet, special, relationship and I pray it never changes. I can't wait to see what he does in life. Because its going to be big. I can just feel it!